The Grasshopper And The Ant

So Congress passed a bill today that would help bail people out of their poor mortgage decisions with 300 Billion dollars. Here we go with the freakin government taking over everything! Why cant we just let bygones be freakin bygones!? And stupid idiots be stupid idiots? It makes me think of a revised edition of the Ant and the Grasshopper story!

The Ant and the Grasshopper each buy a house. The Ant buys a house within his means and chooses the 30 year fixed loan. It may be more expensive than the ARM, but at least it wont change on him! After all, it's the smart thing to do! The Grasshopper on the other hand is a greedy douchbag! His income is no greater than the Ant's, though he still bought a bigger more expensive house for himself, and a couple other houses to rent out for a profit! All on ARM loans. Well to start off, the Grasshopping is doing great! The renters are paying the mortgage for all his homes plus some! He is also making a profit! Then all of a sudden, the market goes to crap and his oh so nice 5% interest only mortgage payments increase 5% every year! So instead of being smarter than a steaming pile of crap and getting rid of his houses, the Grasshopper tries to buy more houses to rent! All on ARM loans again! Well it seems Butt Nugget hasn't learned his lesson yet! So after 5 years, the Grasshopper is now paying 20% interest on all his homes each that are well beyond his means and ends up foreclosing on all of them without paying a freakin dime to the principle! Now the Grasshopper is pissed off because the Ant has a house and he doesn't! So Congress comes back from their four week 4th of July vacation, meets for a week before going on another vacation (while the rest of the country cant pay to fill their gas tanks) and also decides that it is unfair for the Ant to have a home when the Grasshopper does not one or more! So Congress decides to tax the hell out of the Ant to provide 300 billion dollars so all the greedy douchebag Grasshoppers can get their house(s) back. In addition, congress notices that the lender for the Grasshopper is suffering because the Grasshopper never paid his mortgage, and decides to give them money too! And who pays for this??? The Ant does!

Yup, that's exactly how the story goes in the children books!